Expressions

Back in the World – Again


Back in the World 

 You know when you hear a song and it speaks to you, about you and through you? That happens to me a lot with English musician David Gray. I have been a fan since he first hit the scene with his massive hit “Babylon” off of his brilliant album “White Ladders” in 2000. I was lucky enough to be in the room when he recorded an iTunes session for that record, with a horrible cold and a lovely disposition.  There is more than one song of his that has captured a moment in my life.

A track from his latest release, “Mutineers,” is speaking to me now. The last few years have been terrifically difficult, profoundly heartbreaking, and full of every kind of loss. They have also been powerfully moving, showing me the resilience of spirit, the care and concern of friends and family, and the deep, steady love of the man I married. 

It seems like a new era of my life is beginning, a rebirth of sorts, where I am slowly, tentatively, coming out of the murky fog that has surrounded me after sustaining so much loss. I am starting to put my foot back in the water, lift my face up to the sunshine, and breathe in the sweet, fresh air. I wanted to share this because I think that after we come out of a serious illness, a traumatic event or loss, or huge life event, it takes a minute to get our sea legs back. What has happened to us changes us irrevocably, and we need time – to grieve the loss of what we used to know – and to figure out who we are now.

Back in the World” is the perfect song for where I am today, for the tiny buds of hope that are starting to spring up again, for the gratitude of surviving it all, for the love that sustains me. When I hear this song, it resonates and recognizes what’s happening in my head and my heart. I just want to hug the songwriter and say, thanks for listening.

Back in the World

(written by David Gray & Andy Barlow)

Every day when I open my eyes now
It feels like a Saturday
Taking down from the shelf
All the parts of myself
That I packed away
If it’s love put the joy in my heart
Is it God by another name
All I know is 
I’m back in the world again

Like the lift of a curse
Got a whole different person 
Inside my head
No more trudging around
Stony eyed through the town
Like the living dead no
It’s love that lifts us from the dark
Is it God by another name
Who’s to say how it goes
All I know is
I’m back in the world again

It’s the only way to be
It’s the only way to be
I’m naked like a tree
It’s the only way to be
I’m naked like a tree
It’s the only way to be

Less than sand on the beach
Staring into the reaches of space and time
I’m singing out words
But the voice that I hear 
It seems barely mine
If it’s love put the song in my heart
Is it God by another name
Who’s to say how it goes
All I know is
I’m back in the world again
Who’s to say how it goes
All I know is 
I’m back in the world again
Back in the world again

It’s the only way to be
It’s the only way to be

© 2014 iht Records Ltd.